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Romance Scams
Romance Scam book

Our job is to find the answers you need.

Are you the victim of the “Romance scam?” Have you lost thousands, or hundreds of thousands of dollars? Are you thinking something might not be right? Are you saying, how could I have been scammed, I am too smart? Are you emotionally a mess and scared?

How do you know if you are a victim of the romance scam?
             The best way to know if you are a victim is to talk with someone that understands the              romance scam, and can help you identify if you are dealing with a scammer.

What can you do about it?
            Two things.
                        One, take action to insure it doesn’t continue.
                        Two, take care of yourself.

The first is easy, although it doesn’t seem so easy when you try. You need to immediately cut off any further contact with the person you are having doubts about until you learn if he/she is a scam artist.

The second is much harder and the least attractive path that you need to follow. It sounds easy but it’s not. You need to get help. Victims of the romance scam are very much like victims of physical abuse, where many times the victim of abuse continually going back to the abuser. That’s what many first time victims do too. As a matter of fact being a victim of the romance scam is being abused… by the scammer. Their goal is to take every bit of your money, and they will if you continue!

How can you implement a plan to overcome your problem?

The first action is to get off the computer, get off your email and take a look at what’s going on. Get out of the house. Get involved in something you love to do. Most victims are vulnerable, many times lonely, and always emotionally involved with their scammer. Their scammer makes them fall in love and is like a drug. This is exactly what the scammer wants to happen. They convince you that they love you, are relying on you, that you are very important to them, and that they need your help so they can get home to you.  They feed you with lots of love talk that is intoxicating. They are masters at building the fairytale of your dreams. It is just that. A fairytale! Remember, you are on the Internet. You have never met this person. Nine times out of ten, you have never even seen this person on camera because they told you they don’t have a camera or it is broke. If you have seen this person on camera, it is a fake video.  They will tell you they will repay all the money to you, and that you will have a beautiful life together. This is NOT true! They are NOT who they pretend to be and they will NEVER come home. You are now invested with your heart and your hard earned money that you desperately need back. Here’s the thing. The more you are in contact with your scammer, the more distressed you will become and the more money you will lose. It’s a losing proposition! You have to accept the fact that you are in love with a picture, and the man behind that picture is a romance scammer that wants one thing…YOUR MONEY! 

So, what do you do? You need to immediately discontinue any further contact. Immediately change your email address and phone number. Block them you’re your Facebook, and remove yourself from the online dating sites. Don’t go back.

A good friend of mine was a victim of the romance scam. She decided to fight back and now provides a resource for victims of the romance scams. She wrote a terrific book (second one is on the way!) about the subject. I highly recommend that you get it and read it. It’s very detailed. I promise you that you will recognize many of the red flags that have been used on you. You will read things in this book that your scammer has said to you. The similarities between the various types of scams are closely interwoven. Arkansas Investigations helped her with tracking some of the scammers and with small bits of the material, but I don’t get anything from the book other than knowing that you are getting help. This is very important and it can save your life and finances. Get the book!

You can contact her directly at Ask to join her Facebook group “Support Group for Romance Scam Victims.” You will find much help from Diana and other victims from all around the world. To visit her website and listen to some of the radio shows go to

We can only provide limited services to victims, but we will do everything that we can. You can reach us through this page.

Here’s a sample of the type dialogue that victims have had when they contact Diana and join her Facebook Group. You might recognize part of this scenario.

You don’t have to go through this alone. Contact Diana and let her walk with you.


Here's an example of a conversation with Diana:Diana Garren

Sue   Thank you all so much for welcoming me to the group!!!! Mine is a looooong story, so much pain. I am thankful for you all!

Diana L. Garren When you are ready to tell your story, I am here to listen. If you need to talk please send me a message! ? (((hugs)))

Sue Thank you Diana. I lost hundreds of thousands of dollars!!

Diana L. Garren You are so welcome Sue. This is so much money my friend. I am so very sorry! 

Sue Please everybody pray for me! I finished reading Diana L. Garren's book early this morning. After 22 months of terror and pain, and thousands of dollars, today is the day I am going to change my phone number and email address. I am all alone remember, have a very poor support system, so I need all of you to be behind me. I am so scared but I am relying on God's power to help me get this done. Thanks everyone in advance.

Diana L. Garren Sue, I applaud you for taking the step to cut him totally off by changing you phone and email. I know how hard it is to do this. I promise you in time, you will come back to living "real life" again instead of a "virtual life" filled with terror, pain, lies and deceit. You have us as your support system. We will not leave you and neither will God. It will be very important for you to get out of the house. Find some activity that you love and do it my friend. Don't be afraid of "freedom"! God doesn't want you in bondage to this horrible person. He has removed the blinders so you will be free. You CAN and WILL do this! ? (((hugs)))

Sue I am so scared

Diana L. Garren What are you scared of Sue?

Sue I am scared they will find me and hurt me. They can kill me, I don't even care. As long as it is not painful, and is quick.

Diana L. Garren Sue, please do not worry about this. They are trying to scare you so you give them more money. What have they threatened you with? As long as you do not go to meet them you should be ok my friend. ? (((hugs)))

Sue They haven't threatened me yet, but a month from now is when he is supposed to be able to come from Turkey to see me. Yes, he is an "engineer" with a thick accent, and has been stuck in Turkey after not being able to finish a big project and needed all that money for various fees and equipment, etc., and I have been sending him large amounts of money including mortgage money from selling my house, cash advances from credit cards, and a lot of my disability income, leaving me so broke that I have been eating stale bread, and going without a lot. I sold all my fine jewelry, moved into a tiny apartment, have lost so many friends over this. He has been in "detention" over there and my money was supposed to let him out next month - he has a "lawyer" who has been very aggressive and demanding, and now I will probably hear about how James is suffering so badly and he will probably say that he is dying because of this.

Diana L. Garren Oh Sue, I cannot even express how bad I feel that this scum was able to take so much from you. My heart is broken for you. Everything you are telling me is 100% Nigerian scammer. The lawyer is another scammer in his group. Like always, his story is getting more and more grandiose. Everything he tells you are ALL lies! Please, DO NOT have any further contact with him. Please change your phone number, email addresses and every other way he contacts you. Where did you meet him? Much love and huge (((hugs))) for you.

Sue Thanks for the hugs. I met him on Our Time, a dating site for seniors. That was almost 2 years ago. I fell for it mainly because he was so consistent about telling me that he would pay it all back when he gets home, and the lawyer is keeping track of every dime I have sent. Thank you for not being judgmental; I told you that I have lost many friends over this. They turned away from me in disgust. I don't know what hurts most. Thank you for your care.

Sue The "lawyer" has been the roughest on me and has called me things like stupid and is very demanding. For a long time I was sending the money, per his request, to Lagos but MoneyGram finally stepped in and refused to complete the transaction, so they changed it to a receiver in Turkey, where they supposedly are and where James is in "detention." MoneyGram let me send it to Turkey.

Sue He is now saying that there is a court order to pay $1500 now or James will be sent to the real prison. He is sounding panicky.

Sue I told him I don't have to send him anything. I am so empowered after reading your book!

Diana L. Garren Hi Sue, I would never be judgmental. My friend, I am sorry to be the bearer of bad news. You will NEVER get any of this money back. Please tell me why you are still talking with him?

Sue I know I won't get my money back. It will have to be a lot of work to pay back those personal loans and cash advances.

Sue It feels like some sort of brain washing. My eyes were finally opened about a month ago and I got so upset the police had to come and then I was taken to the ER. I couldn't stop crying and shaking but I calmed down. They let me go home in the evening. They were very compassionate, especially the women I encountered.

Sue I changed my phone number yesterday and am not talking to James anymore. It was the "lawyer" and James' mom who emailed me only. This is the end, I told the lawyer to never ask me for money again. I never speak to the "lawyer" on the phone. I don't do email with James, and now he can't call or text either.

Diana L. Garren Sue, you will get through this. I will walk with you all the way!

Sue Thank you so much Diana. You and your book are life savers.

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